Mind in the Gutter

The other day all the Lee kids were over at our house to play.

I found Sam's Leap Pad on the kitchen table and picked it up to put it away.

And I saw this...

And I think it's pretty obvious as to what the drawing looks like.

I was certain one of my oldest two had used the leap pad to draw a dirty picture for their boy cousins.

"Who did this?" I asked, as I picked the pad up off the table.

"What?" Allyson said.

"This!" I said as I pointed to the screen.

"Who's been drawing ding-dongs on the leap pad?  Sam or Jack?"

"Um, Landry's the only one I've seen playing with it," she answered.

Not good, I thought.  Sweet, little Landry, using the leap pad to draw what was obviously a ding dong.  

"Landry, did you draw this?" Ally asked.

"Um, yes," she replied in the sweetest little whisper of a voice.

Uh, oh, I thought.  She did it.  The poor girl.  All these boys have corrupted her sweet, innocent brain.

"Why?" Ally continued to question her.

And in that sweet whisper she answered, "I was trying to make a Y."

A "Y."

Of course.

LaLa needs to get her mind out of the gutter.

Our Trip to the Mountains

Last week our family of five loaded up and made the long drive to Pigeon Forge, Tennessee.  We stayed in a log cabin, shopped at old country stores and went to the Dixie Stampede.  We also enjoyed a day at Dollywood.  Wow, that's a sentence I never thought I'd type...We enjoyed a day at Dollywood.  I am securing my status as the proud mother of three, little rednecks.

The Highlights...

Sam asking, "Are we at Hollywood (Dollywood) yet?" at least a hundred times.

The squeals of delight when my boys saw the huge inventory of toy guns at the old country store.

Discovering that Will might love roasted corn on the cob as much as his Mama.

Riding the log ride with Sam.  He loves rides just like me.  Jack loves rides as much as Jody does...not so much.  The log ride was extremely fast and he loved it.  He insisted on riding it twice and I won't soon forget the smile on his face.

The boys excitement when we entered our cabin.  They both said they really want us to live in a house like that all the time.

Dollywood.  It really is an amazing park with great rides, delicious food and a train that carries you through the Smoky Mountains.  It has everything my boys love at this moment in there lives, which is the very reason we had to go.

The Dixie Stampede.  The boys loved it.  All of it.  The horses and pigs and cowboys and Indians.  And making a return appearance just in time for our trip...the buffalo.  Sam Standley was in heaven.  

Popeye made an appearance.

Being around people that didn't bat an eye at my boys in full cowboy gear toting a toy firearm.

Sam and Jack's excitement over the jacuzzi tub.  Forget  a swimming pool.  My little rednecks can have some serious fun in an over sized bathtub.

The Not So Highlights...

The long car ride.  Six hours in a vehicle with a squealing/crying/fussy thirteen month old.  And to make things better, I got carsick.  Very, very carsick.  I think Jody was very tempted to leave me and Will on the side of the road.

The $17.00 drink.  I pointed out a plastic cup to Jody at a concession stand at Dollywood and asked him to get a couple of those because they had a sturdy lid that doubled as a handle.  He returned with two drinks and two bags of chips.  The total...$38.00.  I nearly had a heart attack.

Dollywood has small ponds and creeks running all through the park which are home to lots of ducks.  And these ducks like to move from one water source to the other.  By flying.  Not walking, like any real duck would do.  Me, walking unsuspectingly through the park, pushing a stroller and holding my $17.00 coke, plus ducks that fly five feet off the ground (which is the same height of my head)...equals an unpleasant experience for me.

Choke Hold

Our Easter

Waiting on the Bunny

  If their first run in with the Easter Bunny this year... 

       determines whether or not they'll have their baskets filled,

Sam will be the only happy boy around here in the morning.

Bad Boy

I catch him like this a lot.

Crawled up on the couch, leaning against the back, watching his big brothers play.

Just leaning there, quietly watching a gun fight or wrestling match.

So sweet.

Him, adoring his big brothers.

Or so I thought.

Until I discovered this...

My baby is a rat terrier.

And he has been using our leather couch as his chew toy.

Thankfully,  I am a preferred customer with Leather and Vinyl MD after Jack's love affair with ball point pens.

And now, thanks to Will, I'm putting them on speed dial.

Dirty

Why Will gets two baths a day when oatmeal is on the menu...

Distractions

It's no secret that I love taking pictures of my boys.

I chase them around, begging them to "just be still for one second," hoping for a few good shots.

And, Lord knows, with three very busy boys, the odds are stacked against me.

But I keep trying.

Trying, trying, trying.

And I get a lot of these...

So on any given day, contending with just my boys is enough.

Pleading with them for "just one more" is enough to wear me out.

Enough to send them running off in boredom and enough to make me throw my camera over my shoulder and call it a day.

So I really don't need any thing else conspiring against me.

Like this...

Very friendly, very curious cattle approaching us from all sides...

A large group came in from the left...

Which leads to this...

In comes another group.  Our Herefords are very well behaved.  Look at that straight line... 

One after the other they come.

Distractions, distractions, distractions.

I look to my left and feel certain that every cow, near and far, has joined us.

They stand very close,  watching everything we do.

I tell the boys, "Okay, they're all here now.  And they're just watching us.  Just look at me and not them and we'll be finished in just one minute.  I promise."

They oblige.

But as soon as I begin to try again, I lose the boy's attention again.

And I hear something behind me.

I turn to see this...

On a side note...

I showed Jody these pictures later and said, "Tell me what you think of when you see this."

"Um, okay." he said.

Silence.

"C'mon, don't you see it? Look! Don't you hear James Earl Jones saying, 'If you build it, they will come.' It looks just like that movie, you know the one where the baseball players just appear and walk slowly out of the corn field.  Don't you see it?"

"Um, no, Ang."

"What?  Look at it!  Have you ever even seen that movie?  It's just like it.  If you build it, they will come."

He looks at me as if I'm the dumbest chick on the planet.

And says, "The only thing I see is that I really need to tell Daddy to bush hog that pasture."

He obviously hasn't seen the movie.

Soon, we were completely surrounded...

And the mooing began.

And it was loud.

Very, very loud.

Like cover your ears loud.

And when Jody told me they wouldn't stop because they thought he'd come to feed them, I covered my ears, tossed my camera over my shoulder and called it a day.

Defeated again.

Flying High

Chores

Jody called the other day to tell me he had forgotten to feed the baby calf before work.  So the boys and I headed to the barn to mix her bottle and feed her.  I was proud of my boys' calf handling skills.  They definitely know their way around a cow.

(On a side note...yes, Sam is a redcoat.  And proud of it.  Jack has a new favorite word...baby.  And Will can balance on a bucket like nobody's business.)

We were also told to let the chickens out.  Sam was suppose to let the chickens out.  This is him, in all his redcoat glory, pleading with me not to make him do it.  

"They're flapping at me Mama.  I hear them flapping."  

I floundered between comforting my child and his understandable bird fear and forcing him to suck it up and just do it so I didn't have to.

I begged him to do it.  I told him he was the bravest boy around and had nothing to be afraid of.  I got really desperate and said, "Sam, any real cowboy could let the chickens out.  Are you a real cowboy?"

He wasn't buying it.

I searched all around the barn for the longest contraption I could find.  I had a plan.  I'd hide behind the door, protected by an old chicken/rabbit box, and force the door open, completely out of sight and away from the stampede that would ensue.

I found a long metal pole and got into position in my hiding spot.

My children waited patiently on the gator.

My pole wasn't long enough.

I reached.  I leaned.  I balanced on one foot, stretching as much as my body would allow.

I couldn't reach.

I was forced to stand in front of the door and use my pole to flip it open.

I approached quietly.  I heard nothing.  "Hmm," I thought.  "They don't hear me.  They're still roosting.  I can do it. I can do this."

Wrong.

Those birds are like Pavlov's  dog. 

They hear a gator motor in the distance and they start stretching and getting into their sprinter stance.  Quietly.

So I flip the latch and ...

STAMPEDE!

I toss the pole, scream loudly and beg my legs to run faster than they ever have.

I spin out on a rock, leaving a cloud of dust behind me.

I dove onto the gator, Dukes of Hazard style, screaming and scaring the *&$% out of my children.

And only after pulling into our driveway did I feel the result of my burn out on the gravel.

I hopped of the gator, feeling pretty good about my speed and agility.  And then my feet hit the concrete and my legs buckled.  Hello groin muscle, where have you been all my life?  

I limped for three days.

And I made it very, very clear to my husband that never, ever again will I "let out" or "put up" anything with wings on this farm again.

Period.

Poor Baby

5.11.24

Will adores his Daddy.  

He lights up when he gets home from work.

And he becomes the happiest boy on the planet when Jody takes him to see the cows.

But his Daddy can also make "the lip" appear faster than anyone.

Most of the time "the lip" appears after Jody disciplines him.

But sometimes his Daddy thinks it's funny to try to force "the lip"  to appear.

By doing things like this...

Which leads to this...

My poor baby...

a Daddy that likes to make him pout and a Mama who takes pictures of it.

My poor, poor baby.

My Cowboy's Birthday Party

Evidence

If you (Jack) are going to sneak cheetos to your brother(Will) after your Mama told you not to, you may want to grab a wet wipe and wash away the evidence before she sees it.

3.5

My Jack.  Three and a half today.  In the blink of an eye.  In his element.  At the barn.  Pajama shirt.  Dirty jeans.  Boots on the wrong feet.  Climbing fences.  Opening gates.  Balancing on old pieces of wood.  Running.  Laughing.  Too busy to be still for a picture.  Even for his begging Mama.  So I stop asking.  And just watch.  Him being him.  My boy.  So happy for a few stolen moments with just me. And me, just as happy for the same.   Three and a half.  Still spunky.  Still joyful.  Still sneaky.  Still mischievous.   Still sweet.  Oh, so sweet.   Just the other day, on a day full of friends and family and games and fun and being outside until it was dark, a day when he had so much to enjoy, I wondered what he'd say was his favorite part of our busy day.  That night, as I held him close and swirled his hair as he twisted mine, I asked him, "Jack, what was the best part of your day?"  And I expected to hear, "playing with Cade" or "cupcakes" or "going for a hunt in the woods."  Instead, he paused, and nuzzled his sweet head closer to my neck, "When you carried me Mama."  My heart swelled.  "When I carried you where, honey?"  "Through the pasture.  When you carried me and held me in pasture."   Of all the exciting, fun things he did that day, walking through the pasture with me, as he climbed from my back to my shoulders to my hip, was his favorite thing.  A reminder that it's the simplest things that matter the most.   Like piggy back rides.  And late afternoon walks.  And little boys that still want to be held.  My Jack.  My wonderfully sweet,  three and a half year old, Jack.  

Old School

Cade and Cannon have introduced my boys to old school music.  Like Michael Jackson.  And MC Hammer. Move over "Sink the Bismark" and "The Ballad of Davy Crockett."  My boys are spreading their wings and venturing out into the world of "Beat It" and "Turn This Mutha Out."  And since I once dreamed of being one of MC Hammer's back up dancer, I'm pretty pumped that he is now on my ipod and enjoying some frequent play time.


Now it's time to make my boys understand the songs a little better.


Overheard today...


Sam and Jack broke into a rendition of "Who Let the Dogs Out?' while getting dressed for school this morning (On a side note, this annoying song is not on my ipod.  And I certainly didn't introduce them to it.  I can thank Ally and her kids for that.  They gave Sam a birthday card that sings it and I bet the boys have opened that card 100 times to hear "Who Let the Dogs Out?  Who?  Who? Who?")  After singing it a few times Jack, turned to me with a concerned look on his face and said,"Mama, who did it?  Who really let those dogs out?"


At dinner tonight, the boys decided to sing a little MC Hammer.  And they put the lyrics into action...


"See this cup Jack?  Can't touch this!"
Jack waved his pizza in the air, "Can't touch this!  Sam, Sam, you can't touch this!'
"Want some of my pizza, Will?  Too bad.  Can't touch this!"


And since they take songs a little too literally, I'm wondering if it was the best decision to introduce them to "Ice, Ice Baby".  Note to self, turn off the ice maker in the fridge first thing in the morning.

13 Months

13 Months Old

New Tricks:

Waving "bye bye" to the bath water after he gets out of the tub

Giving kisses

Showing his "muscles"

Removing the drain in the bath tub

Will amazes me with his ability to "fix" things.  He definitely has a mechanical brain and can often be found correctly assembling Sam's nerf shot gun bullets (placing the nerf bullet into a plastic shell) and loading them into the gun the right way.  He loves playing with toy tools and knows how to use the screwdriver and the hammer to put the pieces into the correct places.  He also works very hard to put on any shoes he finds lying around and can put his own hat on and loves to try to put his brothers' belts on.

Loves:

Cows.  Will is in love with his Daddy's cows, much more so than his older brothers were at this age.  He "moos" at his Daddy as soon as he walks in the door which is him saying, "Take me to see the cows, Daddy."  Moo.  "Please, Daddy."  Moo.  Now, Daddy!"  It is his absolute favorite thing to do.  Just put this sweetie on the gator and drive him through the pasture and he'll be happiest boy around.  And he will also show you his temper if you leave his cows before he's ready.  

M and M's.  Its genetic.  Just like his Daddy and two older brothers, he loves peanut m and m's.  We have a jar of them on our kitchen counter and he now points and grunts at the jar every time he passes it.  I may need to hide the jar.

Playing outside, dancing, dumping water out of the tub, oatmeal, climbing the bunk bed ladder, playing in Mama's china cabinet.  

Changes:

Will gave up formula nearly a month ago and switched easily to cow's milk.  

He's taking more steps, but is still not a "walker".  Will could have been walking months ago, but he still prefers to crawl.  He's becoming braver and "letting go" a little more each day.

He now has six teeth and wears all 18-24 month clothes.

New words: "eat", "Mama",  "hey"

Becoming more of a Daddy's boy, but still only wants his Mama at bedtime.

Will remains the happiest, sweetest, most lovable little boy.  He is warm and tender and full of smiles and laughter.  He makes every day better just by being here, sharing his precious heart and sweet spirit with us.  He is so loved and adored and I am so overwhelmed with thankfulness that I get to be his Mama.  Thirteen months of bliss with my wonderful, beautiful boy.  

Seeing Us

Something about this picture reminds me of us.  Allyson and me, when we were little.  Some part of this looks so much like us to me.  I just can't quite figure out what that part is.  Me with the short, messy hair.  Her with the long, wavy hair up in a ponytail.  Or maybe it is just a reminder of many of our pictures when we were small.  Her having to put a tight squeeze on me to keep me still.  And now our littlest ones doing the very same.